Queen of Bitching.

I am going to be mean in this post.

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Have you ever come across the fat girl in school whom people avoided because they are generally afraid that they will be the subject of her latest gossips? She's like the girl who is oh-so-perfect and full of herself, she's unconcerned about simple things like, watching her diet for instance? And at night, she would whine to her brainwashed boyfriend about the latest gossips, and goes along spreading the rumours with her.

I term this girl, the Queen of Bitching, or QoB. There are QoBs everywhere we go. I remember in every stage of my schooling life, there had to be one girl I had to avoid at all costs. In primary school, secondary school, polytechnic and now, even in university. And in all cases, she's a fat, ugly, bitch. Their tongues are like the trap door that sends you to hell. Once the mouth opens, its hard to stop it as she will persevere to ensure that each and every one of the people in her social circle, gets hold of the news.

QoBs resides in the heartlands. (There are some atas QoBs who live in landed property) She is generally too caught up messing about with people's lives, she forgets to care about her own. She would rummage through each and every poor soul's dirty laundry, excavate and extricate every detail of a broken relationship and at times, direct insults be it direct or indirect to her targets.

QoBs spend a lot of money. They spend a lot on things which keep them happy such as food, travelling, retail theraphy, and did I mention food? Expectantly, they don't earn as much as they spend and are reliant on their daddy, boyfriend, or husband for funds.

QoBs tak sedar diri. I remembered hearing this particular QoB bitching about another girl of her size. She mentioned something about the girl being whiny, fat, clingy, and too dependant. All I could do was look at her and smiled at her petty remarks. One look, and you know that whatever that came out of her sinful mouth, isn't true.

QoBs have a tight immediate social circle. It is important to recognise who their closest friends are and avoid them equally. These people are only a QoB level slightly lower and the news spreading transmission rate between them is highly efficient. Avoid them like you would avoid potholes while riding.

QoBs are messy eaters. You might see this as an opportunity to bank on their weakness. But no, please do not. Always treat them better than they would treat you. Offer them a wet tissue, and tell them to wipe the mess off their stupid face before you lose your patience. Of which, upon losing it, you offer her a tight slap. That should do the job.

QoBs are wasteful people. They order so much food, they can't finish it up. Or they would go driving round and round in the wee hours of the morning to nowhere, and defended themselves by saying "At least I drove around in a Green car!"

Beware, just like the terrorists, the QoBs have matured and has come up with various disguises. They may not follow the description as stated above. A select few QoBs are well-mannered, attractive and eat with a fork and a spoon. Prevention is better than cure.

I wish my readers all the best in walking the tight rope of life. Gossips destroys people and if you are ever guilty of gossiping, stop, drop, and roll into the seven levels of hell. =) Ciaoz!